In our ongoing but previously unknown series of laws of the universe that have been revealed and only ever will be revealed to members of Stormcellar, (and other people who are not members of Stormcellar), here is Stormcellar Rule #43.

Rule 43 - MJEB's Discomfort Dilemma

In any given scenario, the outcome with the greatest public humiliation to greatest comedic effect ratio, is the most likely outcome.